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Two Minutes for #2

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Little Miss Momma: Two Minutes for #2

Monday, October 4, 2010

Two Minutes for #2

{not Baby W, but equally mischievous babe}

We're friends right?!

Like the kinda friends with whom I can share an anecdote from my life that might make you {and me} blush?

If we're not there yet, feel free to skip this post.

But if we are in fact besties, then prepare yourself for what you're about to read.

And then tell me I'm not alone {please}.

There are few "activities" in my life that I get to experience in complete solitude. One of these "activities", usually takes place once the hubby is done with work so he can watch Baby W while I take two minutes for #2.

Yep, I said it!

I go number two.

And yep, it only takes me about 2 minutes {I've learned to be quick}. And during that time I like to be alone--imagine that.

So when Baby W begins banging on the bathroom door yelling "Momma...Mom...Mom" and then slides his chubby little fingers under the door so that I can see them wiggling...well, you can see how it's difficult to focus on the task at hand.

And then to top things off, instead of pulling Baby W away from the bathroom door to allow Momma to enjoy her 2 minutes in peace, the hubby opens it for him...and then shuts the door behind him once he has walked in before I have the chance to protest...

So now it's me, Baby W and a roll of toilet paper that the Lil guy has decided to unravel down to the last sheet. And now Baby W would like to crawl up onto my lap, because as far as he's concerned, I'm just sitting in a chair anxious to play with him and a roll of unraveled toilet paper.

So much for 2 minutes to myself...sigh.

Are we still friends--or have I scared you away forever?

Labels:

51 Comments:

At October 4, 2010 at 10:45 PM , Blogger BFree said...

I am a new friend... and I am not running, but laughing with you. Open door policy in our house whether we want it or not.

 
At October 4, 2010 at 10:52 PM , Blogger Diana said...

too bad this isn't facebook where i can start clicking the "like" button like crazy. I understand completely... & we're still besties :) hahaha

 
At October 4, 2010 at 10:58 PM , Blogger Salena said...

omg, I can totally relate! Not only am I your friend, I'm probably your twin! LOL. No joke... I have 3 that I need to fight off at the door so I can get my "alone" time in the bathroom. Once I can get the door closed, after the pushing back and forth on it game... All I hear is the pounding and "let me in!!!!" protests. Ugghhh.... and does hubby come get them so I can have 'quiet' for myself? NO!!!! A simple task but yet so stressful.

 
At October 4, 2010 at 11:07 PM , Blogger Stacey said...

Yep, welcome to life with children. Or maybe it is just boys? I gave up on bathroom solitude with my first and it's just gotten worse with each one. I personally enjoy having the shower curtain ripped away mid-shower because hey, just because I hear mom's voice doesn't mean she's really there unless I SEE her.
No offense taken.
http://boyohboyohboycrafts.blogspot.com

 
At October 4, 2010 at 11:12 PM , Blogger Kendall said...

Haha, Baby W just loves you so much he doesn't want to ever be apart! Just think of it that way- and next time the hubby pulls a fast one like that on you- do the same thing back at him! :)

Wishing you many happy & peaceful #2's,

-Kendall

 
At October 4, 2010 at 11:38 PM , Blogger Summer said...

Oh gosh that is too funny. I used to let my lil guy in with me..but it really is a nice retreat...even if only for 2 minutes. I find myself running to the bathroom and quickly shutting the door behind me(those lil guys are fast)!!!

 
At October 4, 2010 at 11:38 PM , Blogger Queen Snarfy said...

Kendall - I do the same thing back to him! So mean of me I guess, but, hey, maybe he won't next time... yeah right! ;)

 
At October 4, 2010 at 11:40 PM , Anonymous Leanne said...

I have to say, I'm not sad those days are behind me. It's nice to be able to take more than 2 minutes if I need to. I do miss those chubby little fingers though and all the other little chubby parts. At least you've taught your body to be quick. Now if you can teach Hubby to give you those 2 minutes. Ha!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 12:11 AM , Blogger Missie Krissie said...

Lol, we're still friends :) It's something every Mum has to deal with and I've come to the realization that I may never go to the toilet again by myself. Oh well lol

 
At October 5, 2010 at 4:07 AM , Blogger MostlySunny said...

We are also new friends~and I have the same thing happening at my house. With the "pink" (nicknamed for all the PINK that came into the house after having three boys)if she isn't trying to get INTO the bathroom, she is already IN there unrolling paper and dropping full rolls into the toilet. ahhh--fun. :) Not scared away~standing right beside you (well...not actually--THAT would be creepy! LOL)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 4:19 AM , Blogger Shelley said...

Oh, I love it! My husband does the same thing to me too now. There would be times where I would need to sneak away to get some alone time, not needing to use the bathroom. I would announce that I needed to use the bathroom for #2. I would go in, read a magazine, and relax. Then after a few minutes I'd head back out saying, "no luck". Worked for a while, but now I think he has caught on :)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 4:33 AM , Anonymous mommyread said...

as you can see you are not alone in this! i have 5 children- and the worst is when they come telling me about "she did this" and "they aren't being nice" SERIOUSLY???!!! "let me poo-i'll deal with it in a min.!!!!!" (and people wonder why i give them that look when they tell me how much i'm going to miss these days! pretty little smiles and tight hugs i will miss,,,#2ing alone and in peace-----i will enjoy!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 5:05 AM , Blogger stephaniegiese said...

Oh, you are so not alone. I actually have to bring my 17 month old into the bathroom with me on purpose and make sure the dog is outside before I even attempt to get into the bathroom because our 3 year old has some pretty serious special needs and he will attack them if they are left alone together. I am no stranger to sitting on the toilet with a baby on my lap! Funny, because I just signed on to write a new "pity party" post about this and other similar topics. :)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 5:22 AM , Blogger Shay said...

if anything.. this post made me like you EVEN MORE! so funny.

i'm totally with you.. except i have 2 kids doing it at the same time.

my 3 year old will stand there and say "mom, are you pooping yet.. let me see, need me to wipe your butt"

SOOOO ANNOYING! lol

 
At October 5, 2010 at 5:23 AM , Blogger SAS said...

I have been reading your blog for a few weeks and just had to comment. I have that same problem these days. My little one is 17 months and I can't get away long enough to go #2. Sometimes I just take her with me so I don't have to hear her screaming for me outside the door which doesn't help me go #2. If I do get some quiet time with hubby watching her, I stay in there as long as I can because I don't get much of that anymore!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 5:51 AM , Blogger Michele {The Scrap Shoppe} said...

Story.Of.My.Life. Its as if they think when we go in there we are going to leave via a secret door, and they'll never see us again! :)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 6:38 AM , Blogger Aubrey said...

That is hysterical, in a not so funny, I am sorry I am laughing but I am right there with you way! My favorite I must say is the 2 minute shower, you know the one that you either a) jump out 1 minute in, soap dripping off you, to save the toddler who happens to be stuck up on the counter and is trying to save herself with your curling iron cord... or b) the one you hop out, fix the drama and later realize that you never even washed your hair! ;-)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 7:15 AM , Blogger emilyc @ Sew Super Sweet said...

HA! I think this is a problem for all moms! I haven't used the restroom or taken a bath by myself in 3 years! My hubby now thinks it is funny to lift my little one up over the shower door to "scare" mommy while I have soap in my eyes! :)

I am convinced privacy is obsolete in a house with kids!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 7:37 AM , Blogger nilocrafts said...

I am laughing my hinney off!! This is the story of my life! Thank you for sharing because it made my whole day and made me realize that I am not alone! HAHA!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 7:53 AM , Blogger Embellished Bayou said...

You may enjoy this post:
http://barefootfoodie.com/2010/10/05/together/
It's a little crude, but along the same lines as your post today. It definitely made me laugh!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 8:07 AM , Anonymous Samma Michelle (sammaspot.blogspot.com) said...

You are not alone!! My sweet son is 19 and I would give anything for him to be that age where he crawled into the bathroom and climbed on my lap while I needed to be alone. :0) They grow up quickly...cherish the potty times too!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 8:48 AM , Blogger Ashley said...

I'm with you on this subject, I was sooo sick with the stomach flu, as I'm hurling over with pain, here comes my little one and I find myself sitting down and nursing her as I'm using the restroom....it was terrible for sure! Have a great day =) xoxoxo ~Ashley

 
At October 5, 2010 at 9:01 AM , Blogger Kristyn said...

you are all a lot nicer than me. Jack used to be obsessed with the bathroom and would scream anytime I went in there. But I was not so into the open door policy so he would sit outside the door and cry, I started talking to him through the door and he is totally fine with it now. In fact when I tell him I have to go to the bathroom he goes and sits on the couch until I come out. So whenever shaun and i have to run upstairs for a minute we tell him we are going to the bathroom and he knows that he is not invited. It's pretty funny he totally gets it which is nice since my pregnant bladder causes many trips a day.

 
At October 5, 2010 at 10:01 AM , Blogger Justine said...

This is so funny! I am still here. I will still read your blog :)

Just Better Together

 
At October 5, 2010 at 11:05 AM , Blogger The Shaw Family said...

hahaha... you didn't scare me away! I like to be alone for #2 too, bc i dont like eyes staring me down. But my little ALWAYS ends up in there with me

 
At October 5, 2010 at 11:13 AM , Blogger Jaime said...

HAHA! Yep, that happens at my house! Only there are two sets of chubby fingers and two heads trying to peak under the door. My 2 year old is saying "MOM, mom, mommy. Can I come out? (He hasn't gotten "in" and "out" straight yet.) Momma what are you doing? Mommy, are you going poo poo? **Silence, flush** YAY! mommy you went poop! You get a cracker!!!"

Someday there will be moments of peace right?

http://hectichousehappyhome.blogspot.com

 
At October 5, 2010 at 11:32 AM , Anonymous Jessi J. said...

Laughs, your SO not alone! until recently we didn't have a lock on our bathroom door so, as hubby called it, we had an "Open door policy"... but I do enjoy the lock that we have on the door now :)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 11:39 AM , Blogger sara said...

Still friends and you are not alone!!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 11:52 AM , Blogger Mama Mandolin said...

LOVE your blog. I'm new here! I do lots of crafting during nap time too:) I also am loving your tutorials. I'm thinking of doing a section like that on my blog, too. Any advice?

http://mamamandolin.blogspot.com

I look forward to reading (and crafting) more!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 2:07 PM , Blogger Aurora said...

You are hilarious! I know exactly how you feel. My son does the same stuff. Sometimes when I'm in the shower, he will come in the bathroom and jump right in with me...not cool! Children are...well...interesting :)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 2:18 PM , Blogger Brandy@YDK said...

So funny! I do have to say of all things I miss pre-kid - pooping in peace is #1

 
At October 5, 2010 at 2:18 PM , Blogger Brandy@YDK said...

HA - or maybe it should be #2 and sleep #1.

I crack myself up.

 
At October 5, 2010 at 3:16 PM , Blogger Amber and Trey Collins said...

Your not alone! I have two dogs who follow my 2 1/2 year old in. Because at 2 there is no need for daddy to open the door and I removed the lock so she would not lock her self in :)

 
At October 5, 2010 at 8:46 PM , Blogger Ashley said...

Oh Ashley, this made me laugh out loud! So funny!

 
At October 5, 2010 at 9:48 PM , Blogger Brittany said...

It's kismet!

and not only do we share THIS unfortunate issue, DUDE, I have the Teal Chrysanthemum in your sidebar, Check the pick on my about page. SERIOUSLY.

 
At October 6, 2010 at 7:37 AM , Blogger Suzi Q said...

I love when I am trying to poo and both my children are screaming their heads off. AWESOME. I just want you to know that when I have $$ I want to buy almost your whole etsy shop. hmmmmmk? If we lived close I would share a diet cherry with ya too!

 
At October 6, 2010 at 8:58 PM , Blogger Sarah@AlpinePoppy said...

Ha ha ha ha, NOW we really are friends! Thanks for sharing!

 
At October 9, 2010 at 7:22 AM , Blogger hotpants™ said...

If a mom thinks this is TMI or can't relate, she's lying to herself. I can't go to the bathroom in peace. Ever.

 
At October 9, 2010 at 8:37 AM , Blogger Mari said...

Tee hee hee! I told my husband it wasn't fair that he got to go in peace while I had a baby climbing up my legs while crying and wanting to sit on my lap. I need to close HIM in the bathroom with our boy.

 
At October 11, 2010 at 1:14 PM , Blogger The Social Homeschooler said...

You are hilarious!

The things that we never knew that we were signing up for as parents ;)

I've been in the same position, and had my husband hand me a crying baby to nurse! I know your pain!

 
At November 14, 2010 at 5:22 AM , Blogger JillnCo. said...

Dear LMM, I have 4 kiddos from 16mo-6 years and they always manage to, erm, interrupt me in one way or another! I know you posted this over a month ago but keep fighting the good fight!

 
At December 23, 2010 at 6:29 AM , Blogger Maria Gridley said...

yeah, you are so NOT alone on this one. Ive been through that.. ALL of that from the wiggly fingers under the door (MY FOUR YEAR OLD SON STILL DOES THIS!) to the unraveled toilet paper and baby in lap while TRYING to go.. yano.. #2! Oye.. its like REALLY... do you REALLY want to be in here while im doing this, kid? LOL
I just thought.. what would the hubby think if he happened to walk in and see me holding our youngest son while doing my business. OYE. :)
If I were you I would milk that 2 min and make it 5. I do.... I will go in there even when I dont have to go.. just to TRY and get some peace. :) And Ive learned to lock the door now. SO even with wiggly fingers under the door, banging at the door and 3 little voices asking 'Momma what are you doing?' I can still have some "time" to myself. Just sayin. :)

 
At January 13, 2011 at 1:08 PM , Blogger kate said...

HAHHAHAHAHA oh my goshhh this just made my day!!!

 
At January 17, 2011 at 9:30 PM , Blogger LUCKY 7 DESIGN said...

OMG Ashley you have me crackin up right now. Just wait till he's 4 and wants to hear it and laughs or asks you all sorts of akward questions! I cant tell you the last 2 mins Ive had in my bathroom for 1 or 2...xoxox Still besties!

 
At January 17, 2011 at 9:31 PM , Blogger Teoma said...

friends foreva!!

 
At January 17, 2011 at 9:35 PM , Blogger Heather :: AFD Jewelry :: said...

Hahaha!! Yep, I'm quick now. And heaven forbid I actually shut the door - both of my girls FREAK our! U+I just don't even bother anymore.

 
At January 17, 2011 at 10:15 PM , Blogger Denise said...

I totally understand! And I'll take it a step further...Why is it that we can't get 2 minutes by ourselves for this mandatory activity, yet the husband feels he not only GETS to, but NEEDS to sit in there for AT LEAST half an hour, but more often around an hour? LOL

 
At January 18, 2011 at 5:10 AM , Blogger Sarah @ The Bird's Papaya said...

the title "Restroom" is WRONG!!!!!!!
Also, during a 1 minute #1 break, my (now almost 3 year old) was only 8 months old and her older sister opened the basement door while I was having my MINUTE and down the stairs she went.
Life lesson: any moments of privacy or silence, are a hazard to my kids.
HA!!!

 
At February 22, 2011 at 6:07 PM , Blogger Jenny said...

So I linked to this post from your anniversary post.. and I literally laughed out loud. Because I can beat that... today my 3 and 1 year old joined me when I was doing this "activity".. but with books! For ME to read to THEM! The joys of mommyhood...

 
At May 11, 2011 at 6:20 PM , Anonymous Happy Home Fairy said...

I totally fed my 2-year-old a yogurt cup while sitting on the toilet yesterday. :-)

 
At July 22, 2011 at 9:03 AM , Anonymous Denise said...

I'm late to the party. I realize this post is old. But hey, it's new to me, cuz I just found your blog yesterday.

I thought you were announcing #2 as in...you know...#2 is in the works. Wait. That didn't come out right. As in...you're expecting a #2. Ugh...you know what I mean? That you're pregnant.

Girlfriend (can I call you that now?) no body with kids poops alone. I'm sure of it.

And for the record I can poop in about 45 seconds. 60 seconds if I'm not paying attention.

The trick is to have stinky poop. When the young'uns get to be about 4-years-old they don't like the smell so they don't hang around too long.

 

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