The List

Every Sunday night,
before I go to bed,
I sit down and I make a list
of all the things I hope to accomplish in the upcoming week.

This list literally has over a hundred "to-do's".
And no, I don't get to all of them.
Not even close.

Even the simplest things make the list.
Things like wash my hair, buy toothpaste,
bring sippy cups in from the car.

And then I have my "loftier" goals listed.
Things like start that diet, jog at least 3 times,
no hair pulling, organize my closet.

You see, I'm the kinda girl who likes to put it all down on paper,
and then I get this sort of sick satisfaction from taking a pen
and crossing off the items I have completed.
It's like a drug.

Hello, I am Ashley
and I am addicted to lists.

What's on your list this week? top three.

Psst. Did you notice my new heart stack rings care of Olive Bungalow?

They're my new favorite. Especially the B&A ring.

Cheesy and romantic--just how I like it.

{shop here}

Fleeting Moments

Nap time.

It's fleeting around these parts.

Every day it becomes a bit less consistent,

and I realize it's only a matter of time before it stops all together.

Like clock work, half way through his nap,

Baby W wakes up crying and looking around the room for his Momma.

He spots me, whines until I curl up next to him,

and then closes his eyes, usually puts his arm or leg over me

and drifts back to sleep. 

He always makes sure some part of our bodies are touching

that way I can't sneak away without him noticing.

And yesterday, he wanted to be REALLY sure

I didn't escape our mid-nap cuddle session.

So he threw his entire body on me

and fell fast asleep.

 You're not going anywhere Momma.

I love this boy and his sweaty bed head.

Unexpected Adventure

Sometimes I have one of those days where its harder to get things done.

My mind wanders, I'm not as effective, I forget why I walked into the room.

And then, sometimes one of those days turns into one of those weeks.

Like this week.

As hard as I tried, everything I did seemed to take 3 times longer than it should have.

I used to get down on myself when I had days like these.

But after two years of motherhood, I've learned that this is just part of the territory.

Not only with motherhood, but with life.

Sometimes life takes longer, sometimes we're not at out best, sometimes we only write two blog posts in a week, and sometimes we don't brush our hair.

And you know what?

I think that's okay.

_____________________

This long week ended with a day trip to Huntington Beach to get our family photos taken by Kristen Duke Photography.   I hadn't been to Huntington since I was a kid, and I had no idea how much fun it would be. 

That's the lovely Kristen, in her super duper cute outfit with a necklace I nearly ripped off her neck {but I didn't think that would make a good impression so I just took a picture instead}. 

Can I just tell you that I was fairly confident about this outfit going into the shoot. I loved how the ruffles flowed. I loved how I could still breath in it. I loved that it required minimal adjustments to be picture ready after wresting with a toddler. And I loved that it was a mere $12 at Gap's super sale.  But then I took a look at these few pics that the hubs snapped after our shoot with Kristen, and I started second guessing my outfit selection.  To answer your questions/thoughts/emails in advance, NO I am not hiding a pregnant belly under this dress--the glorious, overflowing ruffles only make it appear as such.  Oh well, right. Live and learn.  I'm sure Kristen's mad photography skills will help take the focus off my extreme "ruffleness" and lack of obvious waistline. Note to self: sometimes tighter clothes actually make you look skinnier, and sometimes looser clothing just makes you look...well..rufflely.

As we headed back to our car we noticed a farmers market just getting started.  So we loaded up on some of our favorite things for the drive home. Chips and salsa, kettle corn, fresh strawberry lemonade, banana bread, and raspberries.  Mmm, mmm good. It was an unexpected bonus to our already fun adventure.  Future trip to Huntington Beach is already in the works.

What did you do this weekend?

Any activities that I must add to my summer list?

The First Wedding Anniversary We've Celebrated Since Becoming Parents

Dear Babe,

Five years, really?

Holy cow.

Remember the day we got married,

later that night, when we finally took a deep breath,

excited that all the wedding charades were behind us,

and now it was just us...

Remember when you asked me,

Where do you think we'll be five years from now?

I didn't know how to answer.

I was just so happy, right there in the moment with you

knowing I would have you for eternity.

I would never lose you again.

For the first time in my life I wasn't obsessing about the future,

so I turned the question back on you.

Me: Hmm, I'm not sure--what do you think?

You: I think we'll have traveled the world. And we'll have two kids. And we'll own a home. And I will be a Statefarm agent and you can stay home and write your book.  And we'll go on lots of adventures. That's what I think.

Me: I think that sounds good.

You: Yeah?

Me: Yeah.

It's funny how things change.

How nothing on that list went as we initially planned.

How what you think you want out of life evolves as real life unfolds.

Our paths have changed so many times over these last five years,

and I think we both like that--I think that's what works for us.

Change.

Constant evolution.

Progress.

Growth.

Together.

Even if our adventures don't necessarily involve  the Seven Wonders of the World,

we've learned that there are still lessons to be learned

from wrangling a toddler and teaching him to be a big boy,

from perfecting a diaper change in the pitch dark,

from starting our own business and figuring out how to

create a separation between work and home,

and even in the art of creating a simple home cooked meal. 

These are our adventures now.

We're like Lewis and Clark

on the frontier that is parenthood.

And there's no one I'd rather have by my side on this adventure.

You make me happy.

And I love you, obviously.

Muah.

xoxo, lee lynn

_______________________________________________________

5th Anniversary Date Night Agenda

1. Leave Baby W with Grandma for the night.

2. First ask Baby W's G-Ma {my momma} to snap some pictures of us.

3. Head to Ruth's Chris for our very first fancy schmancy dinner together {seriously, in five years we have never been to a fancy restaurant where you order everything a la carte}. Order my fave: Creme Brulee

4. Stop by the mall to see if Tiffany's is open...just in case. It's closed, but that's okay because we score some goodies for Baby W at the Disney store instead.

5. Head over for a Chinese Foot Massage...which turns into an unexpected full body massage...with my clothes on...and we are in the room with 6 other people also getting massages...which was strangely fantastic...and even more strangley, not awkward or uncomfortable at all. In fact, let's go back tonight, mmkay.

6. Get home at 10:00 and find Baby W forcing his eye lids open so he can say night-night to us.  He doesn't go to bed for another hour because he is overwhelmed with excitement at the unfortunate discovery of the Disney Store bag.

7. Finally head to bed at 11:30 and...cuddle.  

Now scoot over hubs, and let me take a quick outfit post.

Jeans: Paige Denim, Shirt: Forever 21, Blazer: Express, Shoes: Reflection, Bracelet: Tiffany's, Other Bracelet: Lisa Leonard Designs, Necklace: Lisa Leonard Designs, Purse: Big Buddah, Love Pillow cover: LMM Shop.

I will be linking my outfit up to WIWW on The Pleated Poppy, and Real Momma, Real Style on MGR.

Sidenote: Did I mention that I'm going to Blog Sugar?

Because I am. And I'm excited. Are you going?

Dear Two Year Old Baby W

Dear Baby W,

Our days have been way too hot for you to take your naps upstairs in your race car bed,

so you have been snoozing on the couch while I work away in the next room.

Today you woke up early, in one of those inconsolable bits of hysterical cries.

In fact, you wake up crying from your naps a lot.

It's kinda your thing.

And after two years, you think I'd be used to it by now.

But I'm not.

It still twists my heart in knots.

I feel helpless as my attempts to console you seem to be in vain.

I cuddle you, I kiss you, I assure you that I am right here next to you.

But your cries continue for about 5 minutes--which feels more like 45 minutes.

And then, out of no where, you're fine.

Happy as a clam actually.

Your carefree day continues as if the tears never happened.

Today played out a little differently though.

Maybe because you're getting your molars,

so you're a bit more sensitive than usual.

Because today, when the hysterics started

and I was immediately by your side with my comforting Momma voice,

your crying stopped.

You crawled up on my lap,

rolled over, looked me in the eyes,

gave a half smile and went back to sleep.

Usually I carfeully place you back on the couch

and head over to squeeze in as much work as possible

before you wake up again.

But today I didn't.

Today I stayed.

And I soaked it all in.

The way your once little body now hangs over my legs,

as only your torso now fits on my lap.

The way your once pudgy fingers have thinned out

and now take up the entire palm of my hand.

I brushed the hair off your forehead,

ran my hand over your soft tummy

and squeezed your little toes.

I silently giggled as I noticed how the extreme chubbiness of your cheeks causes them to almost hang on your face, just like mine did when I was your age {and still a little today}.

I even took the time to softly scrape some dried boogies off your face,

as only a Momma can.

These two years have gone by fast my little man.

You have tested me and taught me more about myself

and my purpose in this life than I ever thought possible.

You are talking all the time now.

It's not always the English language, or any language for that matter,

but you're talking--and that gives me relief. 

Your favorite words are: truck, monkey, trash, pool, Buzz and Elmo.

We haven't had a super duper two year old bash for your birthday yet

because your sweet great grandma had an important surgery scheduled

and we know how important it is to have her there for your special day.

So in the meantime, we played it low key,

got you a handful of presents,

{that you eagerly opened with an enthusiastic "Woah"}

took you swimming, and made you your favorite spaghetti

and a batch of botched lumpy whoopie pies. 

It was the perfect day.

Happy birthday big boy!

I love you to the moon and back.

Stop growing up, mmkay...

love, Mommy

Dear other Mommies, what has been the hardest birthday for you yet?

FAQ: Your Questions Answered

In preparing for the new blog design, I finally wrote my long overdue FAQ page.  And since there have been a few delays unveiling the new site, I thought I would post that page here.  These are the answers to the questions I receive most often {via emails and comments}.

What inspired you to share your secret with us? I heard an amazing bit of advice at my first blog conference. That which is most personal, is most universal. I wanted to be able to relate to you, to be honest while still staying positive, to show you that a real person sits behind this screen, and that, like everyone, I have flaws--and my secret is only one of them.  Which is why I even went so far as to even show you a picture of my secret.  And because you are all showed me so much support, I know that I am not alone with my struggles, none of us are.

Do you take medication for your secret? No, I don't.  As a kid I took medication for about 3 weeks.  My Mom said she didn't recognize the kid I became when I was medicated. And it's not that I'm opposed to taking medication for such a disorder, not one bit in fact.  I guess I'm just scared. Scared of the unknown.  At least, living with this disorder, I know what I'm in for every day.  And deep down I have this hope that I can beat this thing on my own one day.  One day...

What advice would you give a blogger who wanted to grow their readership faster? First and foremost, be honest. Readers don't want to be tricked or mislead.  Be YOU.  Also, in the beginning, I made sure to always join link parties, guest post any chance I had, host giveaways, and sponsor giveaways on other blogs.  Leave comments!!!! I have found some of my favorite blogs via comments left on my blog.  The more blogs you have linking to your site the better. Be sure to check out my blogging tips posts for additional {and more detailed} tips.

Where do you shop for clothes? and for Baby W? Almost everything in my wardrobe is from Forever 21, Old Navy, Target and the sale section of Anthropologie. I have NEVER paid full price for anything in Anthropologie--ever! Baby W has a lot of older friends with great style who have graciously passed down their Gap and Ralph Lauren beauties. When I buy new clothes for him, I hit the more budget friendly Children's Place, Old Navy and Target.

Do you blog for money? Blogging is my passion.  When I started blogging, it was to connect with other Momma's out there who might be sharing my experiences. Basically, I blogged to remind myself that I'm not alone.  Eventually, I learned that blogging could also provide for my family.  Best of both worlds. Now I get to do what I love for a living, stay home with my son, and help support fabulous businesses along the way. But I must add, it took a lot of work, and a lot of sacrificed sleep before I started to see a a profit.

How do you find the time to do it all? Be a momma, blog, etsy, church, SOS blog, etc. I don't. I struggle every day to find balance--and I'm a work in progress.  Many days I break down, feel like I am failing, not accomplishing all that I am capable of.  But in between the self doubt, I work to keep faith--faith that I am doing what I am supposed to, even if it sometimes seems too hard.  I fill every second of my day with checking my to-do's off the list {I heart lists}. At the end of the day, there are still a lot of items unchecked, but I do my best to focus on the accomplishments. Woah, that was a roundabout way of answering the question.

Where did you go to college and what did you study? I went to the University of Santa Barbara California (UCSB) for two years before transferring to the University of Southern California (USC). I graduated with a degree in Communication. I had grand plans of doing something big and important in the advertising world. But then I discovered myself a bit more, rearranged my priorities, and changed my plans.  I decided I wanted to do something for a living that made a difference in people's lives. I hope LMM can help me accomplish this goal.

What did you do for a living before becoming a Momma? I worked as a Marketing Director for two companies in the gift industry. Basically, I spent my time traveling to different cities in the U.S. attending trade shows and training sell reps, getting lots of free products, and meeting some pretty talented people along the way. Eventually I got tired of airports and being away from the hubs fro so many weeks at a time...and then I got the baby itch. The rest is history.

So, have you always been Mormon? Nope. In fact, I used to be an atheist. A series of events in my life helped me to find faith.  One day soon, I will blog about my story. My faith is a huge part of who I am--my purpose, my inspiration, my drive, my foundation for everything.

Where did you get that silver heart ring you are always wearing? This is my favorite ring ever. It's a Tiffany's silver heart ring that Ben got for me on our first Christmas as a married couple. I almost never take it off. I contacted Tiffany's and they said they "retired" that ring 2 years ago, but click here for a link to another website that sells the ring {it looks legit, but I'm not sure}.

Do you use magic toothpaste? Hehe, you guys crack me up. No magic toothpaste over here, but I use the next best thing. Crest White Strips or the Target brand of whitening strips. I use them about every 6 months. And I am also an obsessive brusher, drink through a straw, and chew staining foods with my back teeth--I know, I know, a bit overkill.

What's the scoop on your camera? I use a Nikon D3100 and a Canon Power Shot SX20 IS--currently on auto, as I learn all the inner workings and secrets of photography. Click here for all the details on my cameras.

Where did you get your hair extensions? Are they expensive? Are they made with fake hair? They are actually 100% real hair. Fake hair cannot be washed, blow dried, curled or straightened--therefore, I use real hair. My hair dresser has me buy the hair and then she puts it in. I bought my extensions at a local beauty supply store, but I am sure you can find it online as well. I would google: weft hair extensions. My hair dresser braids a corn row into my hair and then she sews the extensions into the braid. They last about 8-10 weeks before she has to take them out and sew them back in. The hair cost me approximately $100 for 2 ounces {which is a lot of hair}, and I have been using the same hair for a few years. It washes just like my actual hair. Be sure to buy the hair type most similar to yours. I use my extensions for thickness, not length. Although I am thinking of getting some longer hair put in.

How did you lose the baby bump? What is your workout routine? Seriously you are all too kind. My answer: Spanx. Also, an energetic toddler that keeps me moving 24-7. But really, the pooch is still very much there. I obviously just don't post pictures that highlight it in all its glory. Before Baby W, I was a work out fiend. 100 mile bike rides, 5 mile runs, spin class 3 nights a week, boot camp--you name it, I did it {except yoga, I'm not really the yoga type}. But in the last 2 years and 10 months, nada.

What does your husband do for a living? Ben is an insurance broker. Mainly specializing in employee benefits packages, health insurance and life insurance. If you ever have any insurance questions, he's better at answering emails than I am. ben@StockHealthInsurance.com

Do you reply to your reader emails? If so, how long does it take you to respond? I do my best. But there just isn't enough time in the day. I have a folder in my inbox titled "sweet emails I need to return", and I have good intentions of returning them all. Whenever I get a free moment, I try to return a dozen or so at a time. But I read every single one of them--often multiple times, and often out loud to the hubs. They make my day, they inspire me, they make me laugh, they bring tears to my eyes, they remind me why I started this blog in the first place--they mean the world to me, I promise!

How do you keep your furniture white with a messy toddler? I purposely bought a couch with slip covers so that I can throw them in the washer when Baby W decides to wipe his spaghetti face on the cushions, or pee on every single panel (true story).  As far as the secret to all other white furniture: Magic Erasers, available at Target--they really are magic (I use them on my walls too). 

Did I forget anything?

Hello Summer

Hello Summer

{inspired by Lisa Leonard's Hello Monday Series}

Hello chubby cheeks, and melted sticky popsicle that collects in the creases of your neck.

Hello tan Summer {and shoe-less} toddler toes.

Hello to my go-to Summer shoes.

Hello local kiddos learning to sail.

And hello crazy lake mansions that I love to gawk at {and imagine I live in}.

Hello to a Baby W who would love to go swimming all day long.

And hello to a baby who prefers falling in the pool rather than jumping.

Hello to the hammock that I have good intentions of finally using.

Hello old cement duck named Gladys that we have to visit every day, so that Baby W can point and say Guck, Guck.

Hello to Baby W's best buddies.

And hello to the Buzz Lightyear that was mine when I was a kid {top shelf, far left, standing up}.

Hello evening game night with hot chocolate and whipped cream on the back patio.

Hello new-fangled Monopoly board {I miss the classic version}.

Hello to my favorite Monopoly properties.

Hello to the braggy winner of game night and hello to the poor sport behind the camera.

And Hello to our Summer fun list:

1. Walk to the lake and feed the ducks

2. Ride bikes around the lake

3. Go to the Santa Barbara zoo

4. Go to Underwood Family Farms and pick berries

5. Learn to bake a homemade pie with said berries

6. Teach Baby W to swim

7. Get shaved ice

8. Build a sand castle at Zuma beach

9. Go on a picnic

10. Make a tent in the living room and watch a movie

11. Go on a night walk

12. Make water balloons

13. Finger paint

14. Take Baby W fishing

15. Throw fish back in lake

16. Have a back "patio" BBQ with friends

17. Get a wagon

18. Play in the sprinklers

19. Visit the fire station

20. Take Baby W to pick out a new book at Barnes & Noble

*what am I forgetting?

What's on your Summer list?